I woke up one night last week from heavy panting, thinking X was dead, but discovering that she was laying down next to me, sleeping soundly.

I'll explain.

The dream I awoke from involved X, myself and Blixa - not the cat, but the singer of Einstürzende Neubauten - and we were trapped on some kind of Mount Everest-ish mountaintop, which was made of rock and ice, shaped like half a circle. I know, weird. As we lay on top of the thing, on the flat side, ice-cold winds blew around us, shimmering snow twirling all around, while the sun was away, all was near-pitch black. X crawled toward Blixa who was lying a bit away. As she moved towards him, a hole suddenly somehow swiveled open, through which both X and Blixa fell.

All I heard was the wind blowing, as I lay on ice, knowing X was falling to another fate entirely. As fear and panic instantly started filling my system, I moved and found myself awake from the dream; it took a few seconds for me to really understand that I wasn't still in the dream, finding X sleeping soundly next to me. God.

I lay down, heart racing, almost feeling the arctic fucking cold in my veins as I desperately tried to go back to sleep.