What follows is culled from a math book that I used when in third grade, which means I was 9-10 years old. I was recently given it by my mother, and I think the reason for it simply is that I'm now more mentally capable to deal with the anguish released by it. So dear reader, let me bring that anguish to you.

The above imagery suggest that the house has a chimney which produces bloody smoke, and that the the pathway to the house has somehow produced a door. It's also good to see that my most aspergerish ways have produced them sun-rays, all drawn meticulously using a ruler. Next!

Hey, wait - that wasn't bloody smoke in the previous picture, it was part of a balloon! Note the sun that looks like a yellow, messy spider, the pencilled-in face, the purple hazy background, the fact that I'd received a "R" (which means "Rätt", i.e. Swedish for "Correct") for this image. Oh, the prior image was noted as being correct, too. Phew.

Now, if this doesn't read like a stalker's diary... Allow me to translate:

"5. And he eats breakfast from one o'clock until five minutes to two = 55 min."

Charming.

"6. She gets parcels ready [sic!] from half past two until twenty past three = 50 min."

Erhum.

"7. She is at church from half past four until twenty to six = ten min."

So, church. In Sweden, the most atheist country in the world. Read on, Flav!

"8. From twenty to six until ten past seven santa comes = 30 min."

WOO!

"9. She dances around the tree from ten past seven until quarter to eight = 35 minutes"

She did? For more than half an hour? She must have needed God's help at stalker point 7 then!

"10. She eats her food from eight o'clock until the clock is nine = 1 hour."

God damn it! This is straight out of "Silence of The Lambs"! She eats the food. She rubs the lotion. It's nice to add that I can't remember writing any of that, or at the very least, questioning it.

"11. From nine o'clock until eleven o'clock = 2 hours."

Em, yeah.

"12. And at twenty past eleven she will sleep."

She will sleep? You little maniac!

Suddenly, Jeffrey Dahmer's dreams of ruling Earth from a skull-riddled throne don't seem so weird. Bonus: my teacher gave me R's on all of this.